The Westside Erection

Now as some of you guys will have noticed… I’m a massive fan of the Westside Connection’s debut album “Bow Down.” I fell in love with it way back in college when my friend stole a copy from HMV (this was before people stole music from the internet). For those of you who have yet to experience the poetic genius of this album, check out the video below for some of the most poignant and thought provoking lyrics ever to be recorded by any rap artist to date:

In my humble opinion, Ice cube, Mack-10 and WC are probably the poet laureates of our generation. Their message of hate, ignorance and segregation still stand the test of time and I’m pretty sure the great Dr. Martin Luther King would be proud.

Anyway, while browsing through Amazon.com one day I came across this rather amusing review for “Bow Down.” I kind of get the impression that the person reviewing it was either a senior citizen, or some sheltered individual who’s probably never heard a hip-hop… let alone… hardcore gangsta rap song in their entire life.

Now a quick glance of the album cover, which consists of three scowling faces (not to mention the parental advisory sticker) should provide the average person with a slight clue as to what they’re getting themselves into. What boggles my mind is how the person reviewing it even came into contact with the album in the first place. Just the image of an elderly person listening to this and going into cardiac arrest always brings a smile to my face.

Anyway, here’s the unedited amazon review in all its glory. Can’t believe the reviewer actually made it to track 10 LMAO.

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1 of 27 people found the following review helpful:

I just listened to this CD for the first time.
I've got to let my opinion on this one be known; before the first track was even half over, I turned it off. I find this kind of stuff VERY offensive!! All it is, is spoken words to some kind of beat that's even worse than disco, and I never thought ANY kind of beat could be worse than disco! To top it off, this CD is one of the reasons why CENSORSHIP should be re-inforced, with greater force than ever!! Before the first track was even half over, I felt like I was listening to something directly out of Webster's Dictionary of Vulgar Language!! How rude!!!!! How rude indeed!!! Track 10 is the WORST–it starts off "a capella" (just the vocal part), with the words "What would you do….", to the tune of the song those words came from, which was "With A Little Help From My Friends" by the Beatles. So I thought, maybe the CD isn't all bad. Then, after the first four words, which is all of 13 seconds into the track, they go right back into their offensive, rude, obnoxious lyrics…and STILL with the same tune as the Beatles song, at least for a little while; whether they stayed that way through the whole song, I have no idea, because the instant they sang the offensive "b—-" word, I turned it off. This CD is worth running over with a truck!! If negative numbers were available in Amazon's rating system, I'd have given this a NEGATIVE 20!! Not worth a single penny!! Not even worth a half penny!!

***PLEASE NOTE: If this type of CD is your cup of tea, then PLEASE know that I'm NOT trying to offend you; this is just my opinion. This is my review, and that surely doesn't mean you have to agree with me, if you happen to call this "music" and really like that sort of thing. Really, no offense intended; just an honest review based on my own tastes. However, if you're listening to this CD in your car, PLEASE keep the volume down, and especially, PLEASE keep the bass level down, so other drivers don't have to hear this CD go "BOOM-BOOM-BOOM," which I feel is just as offensive as the lyrics, especially at 1:00 in the morning. Also, remember, politeness will lead to a lot more peace, happiness, and good health in your life than rudeness and bossiness and offensiveness would.

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Well… there you have it; one of the funniest amazon reviews I've ever read. By the way… just incase you're wondering what track pushed the reviewer over the edge. Here it is: